I wrote this poem in March I was just abused again that day That was the last time I ever got abused because i finally reached out for help.
BEHIND MY BEDROOM DOOR:
For many years I have always been hiding painful secrets behind my bedroom door.
Hiding many years of abuse and pain I just kept praying it wont happen any more.
The painful words, violent strikes and forced sexual pleasure for his every sexual needs.
Guilt and shame was how I was too scared to speak out I was hiding as my heart bleeds.
At nights i just lay at night finding blame in myself,thinking if I would have loved him more.
Seems the more I would try to love him more the abuse only grew but I didn’t know what for.
stolen my pride my womanhood and my soul from me every time he wold keep putting me down.
No one ever saw the hurt in me because I tried to hide my pain with fake smiles tried not to frown.
Years of hiding pain trying to stay strong for my girls to ashamed to let them see weakness in me,
Ashamed of telling what goes on, show people this hurt in pain and too to ashamed to let anyone see.
The one last time he had raped in his violent rage is when I knew i just could not hide or take anymore.
I had to speak out and show my years of pain and tell everyone exactly what is behind my bedroom door.